Let me trace a typical marriage in India-
Two people have to stay with each other. For whole life. What we do? Find a person for them through some contact, check their CV like it’s a job offer and finalise the deal with their parents in some weeks like a business dealing. Oh, wait we had two people supposed to live with each other, right? Who cares when two families are happy with the said business transaction!
Marriage finalised? Let’s decide the transaction fees. Obviously I know we are growing up in an idealist society where no one asks for dowry, aren’t we? Whatever the bride’s family gives are ‘gifts’ given with their own happiness. Now that’s a cute way to address dowry. Gifts start from household items like TV, Fridge, Washing Machines and go up to luxury cars and if you got the moolah for that then private jets and choppers too are included. Anything below these is not even a gift, it’s a shame. Rates are different, a well qualified, highly paid groom deserves larger gifts, bigger gifts. But even if the groom is not well qualified or well paid he wishes for a gift, why? Don’t you dare ask why, he was born with a holy penis! isn’t that enough?
You know why a man earns in this country? So on one day, called the day of his daughters marriage, he spends his lifetime’s earnings. That’s the level of intelligence we grow up with. Calling hundreds of guests, booking the most lavish of marriage halls, hosting those guests with the most exquisite of menus, and buying shitloads of gold ‘cos “shagun’, even when your pocket can’t afford it. Why? because your respect in society is directly proportional to how regal your daughter’s marriage was.
I don’t overlook the love for your daughter here, nor I am underestimating the value of gold in hard times. But there is always a limit which most families have to cross thanks to the societal pressure.
You ask me why we as a country are infamous for killing females in the womb? Why are they reminded in every second of their existence that they are a liability? Why are daughter undesirable to many?
I have one answer to you, and that is marriage, in its current form. The shameless splurge of cash, for one day of merry-making, that leaves crores of people stripped of their life-time earnings and many others in huge loans.